User:Ranatalus

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Ranatalus, better known as Yamato, has been playing DDR since 2006. His favorite mix is SuperNOVA, second being DDR X CS. He has 12 AAs, has passed MAX 300 with 122 greats, 3 goods, and 21 misses. He also claims to have passed PSMO Extra Stage on Super Heavy, but everyone knows that this is way too difficult for any human being to pass. In his free time he enjoys watching anime, playing DDR on his Cobalt Flux pads, drawing fan art/writing fan fics, and browsing 4chan and having sex with chickens. His favorite food is ramen, with pocky as a close second. He does his best to attend Ohayocon every year, and come up with a new overrated cosplay each year. Occasionally, you can find him getting his dance on at his local arcade (Magic Mountain Polaris) where he plays custom r21 songs on their ITG2 upgraded cabinet. Many of his songs are anime themes or video game songs.

Contents

TWG

rantalus cheats at twg by edited other user's post![1]

Omegle

You: HI HOW ARE YOU TODAY
Stranger: ciao bella!
Stranger: good thanks, you?
You: I'M DOING GREAT
Stranger: good
You: ARE YOU INTERESTED IN PURCHASING A DONG
Stranger: male or female?
You: I HAVE MANY MODELS
Stranger: a dong?
You: FEMALE DONGS?
You: THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE SIR
Stranger: vietnamese currency/
You: YES, A DONG
Stranger: ?
You: NO
You: A PLEASURE DEVICE
You: A DILDO
Stranger: oh, you smoke the weed through it
You: SCHLONG
You: SIR I WILL NOT TOLERATE ILLEGAL ACTS
Stranger: do you always shout so?
You: AND MARIJUANA IS ILLEGAL
Stranger: depends where you are, stranger
You: I APOLOGISE MY KEYBOARD DOES NOT WORK PROPERLY
Stranger: fitting
You: I AM LOCATED IN DELAWARE, UNITED STATES
Stranger: is that near de la soul?
You: NOT TO MY KNOWLEDGE
You: WHERE IS THAT
Stranger: you're left-handed
You: NOT FOR THE LAST 73 YEARS I HAVEN'T BEEN
Stranger: ask me how I know
You: RIGHT HANDED, GOOD SIR
Stranger: hey tell me this
You: SURE THING
Stranger: how do you keep a fool in suspense?
You: ONE OF MY MANY DONGS SHOULD DO THE TRICK
You: DEPENDS HOW MUCH OF A FOOL HE IS
You: AND HOW LONG YOU NEED TO KEEP HIS ATTENTION DIVERTED
Stranger: so you're a 73 year old dick peddler?
You: I WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU'D WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE
Stranger: if I could watch my language, I'd be signing
You: OR PERHAPS HALLUCINATING
You: SEEING THE WORDS SPROUT FROM ONES OWN MOUTH
Stranger: can you dong the caps lock key perchance?
You: THAT HAPPENED TO ME ONCE
You: I WAS IN VIETNAM
You: YEARS AGO
Stranger: I knew it
You: ONE OF THE LOCALS MADE US SOME TEA
You: IT WAS QUITE DELICIOUS
Stranger: yes yes but what about caps lock?
You: THAT NIGHT, OUR PLATOON ALL HALLUCINATED
You: WHAT ABOUT IT
Stranger: can you dong it, just once?
You: IF I TURN IT OFF IT COMES BACK ON AFTER 2 KEYPRESSES
You: IT IS A BIT OF A NUISANCE I ADMIT
Stranger: do you pre-test your dongs?
You: WHY YES WE DO
You: WE ALSO SELL PRE-OWNED MODELS
Stranger: we?
You: BY "WE" I MEAN "MY COMPANY"
You: DONGS FOR SALE
Stranger: ah
Stranger: dongs from delaware nowhere near de la soul
You: WELL I AM UNSURE WHERE DE LA SOUL IS
Stranger: how long is your dong?
You: MY PERSONAL FAVORITE IS "DANNY'S HARD SLAMMER"
You: IT'S 9 1/2 ", MADE FROM THE FINEST SEMI-SOLID LATEX
Stranger: is that some sicko jail pun?
You: AND RUBBER
You: WELL, IT WAS REQUESTED BY A MAN WHO HAD RECENTLY LEFT PRISON, YES
Stranger: did you test that one?
Stranger: did it stretch your ring?
You: HE SAID THE MEN HE FOUND DOWN AT THE LOCAL CLUB FOR HOMOSEXUALS COULD NOT SATISFY HIM AFTER HIS PRISON STINT
You: YES, I WAS THE TEST SUBJECT FOR THAT MODEL
You: AND I FOUND IT COMFORTABLE AND EASY TO HANDLE
You: THAT WAS 6 YEARS AGO
Stranger: and did he enjoy you too?
You: ENJOY ME? WHAT DO YOU MEAN
Stranger: well you tested that model
You: YES I DID
Stranger: yes, by special request
You: YES
You: AND IT BECAME QUITE POPULAR
Stranger: I assume he was satisfied
You: WELL, HE DID COME BACK AND BUY 3 MORE
Stranger: but did he *enjoy* you?
You: I'M NOT SURE I UNDERSTAND
Stranger: oh, you mean you tested the dong
You: HE SEEMED TO HAVE A GOOD TIME TALKING TO ME ABOUT THE SUBJECT OF DONGS
You: BUT DO YOU MEAN "ENJOY" SIMILAR TO SAY
You: THE WAY ONE WOULD ENJOY A SANDWICH
Stranger: not unless you like them brown and tasting like shit
Stranger: sorry, poo
You: SIR I ASKED YOU ONCE TO MIND YOUR TONGUE
You: THANK YOU
You: PLEASE BE MORE CAREFUL IN THE FUTURE, IT UPSETS MY WIFE TO HEAR THOSE THINGS
Stranger: she hears what I type?
You: I HAVE MY COMPUTER SET TO SPEAK THE WORDS THAT ARE SENT TO ME AS MY SIGHT IS NOT WHAT IT ONCE WAS
Stranger: what dark arts do you practice?
You: IT IS EASIER FOR ME TO HEAR THAN TO READ
Stranger: can your wife read ok?
Stranger: did she object to your testing?
You: SHE IS MY MOST VALUED ASSISTANT
You: BUT MOSTLY IN THE DESIGN PHASES
You: SHE DOES NOT TYPICALLY TEST THE MODELS
You: FOR PERSONAL REASONS
Stranger: is she younger than you?
You: OH YES
You: SHE JUST TURNED 64
Stranger: is your wife a goer?
Stranger: know what I mean?
Stranger: nudge nudge wink wink
You: SIR PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE
You: THAT IS MY WIFE YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT
Stranger: say no more, say no more
Stranger: how long were you in Vietnam for?
You: A WEEK SHY OF TWO YEARS
Stranger: 12 inches? badum tish
You: I'M NOT SURE I UNDERSTAND
Stranger: were you testing dongs there?
You: NO I WAS FIGHTING A WAR
Stranger: or just local drugs
Stranger: whose side were you on?
Stranger: I always root for the Vietcong in the movies, but they never seem to get a good deal
You: I WOULD ASSUME IT IS QUITE CLEAR I WAS ON THE AMERICAN SIDE OF THINGS
Stranger: well assumption is the mother of all um mistakes
You: GOOD BOY
You: YOU SEEM LIKE A NICE ENOUGH YOUNG LAD
Stranger: you assume a lot
You: MINUS THE OCCASIONAL INAPPROPRIATE LANGUAGE
Stranger: well I try
Stranger: your spelling is good, are you sure you're from the US?
You: QUITE CERTAIN
Stranger: I smell a rat
You: I WAS BORN IN ILLINOIS, JUST OUTSIDE OF SCHAUMBERG
Stranger: can't possibly be
Stranger: anyway, it's of no consequence
Stranger: so why do you peddle your didlos here then?
You: I LIKE TO TRY TO KEEP ON THE CUTTING EDGE OF THINGS
Stranger: oh
You: AND THIS OMEGLE THING SEEMS LIKE A GOOD OPPORTUNITY TO GET THROUGH TO PEOPLE THAT MIGHT NOT OTHERWISE BECOME AWARE OF ME
Stranger: as long as that's not a design feature... cutting edge dildos will not be a lucrative proposition I can imagine
You: HAHA, THAT'S A GOOD ONE
Stranger: has your wife ever designed you a dildo that made you feel inadequate as a man?
You: NO SIR
Stranger: wow she really loves you!
You: I DO NOT COMPARE MYSELF TO THESE ITEMS AS THEY ARE DIFFERENT TOOLS FOR DIFFERENT JOBS
Stranger: have you tried peddling to them at that homo bar you spoke of earlier?
Stranger: roughly what split of your sales is homo:hetero, by the way?
Stranger: do you make double-side lesbo dildos too?
Stranger: chap, are you ok over there?
Stranger: hey delaware dildo dude
Stranger: wifey!
Stranger: come quickly he's passed out
You: I APOLOGISE
You: I HAD TO TAKE MY HEART MEDICATION
Stranger: ah whew
Stranger: I thought you were a goner for a second
You: I APOLOGISE FOR WORRYING YOU
Stranger: I have a great idea for a new dildo for you
You: SURE THING; GO AHEAD
Stranger: you know these lesbain couples that want to conceive?
Stranger: why not make a dildo that you can pre-load with donor semen
Stranger: then at the appropriate time, they can press a button and have it released
You: WE ARE ALREADY WORKING ON A PROTOTYPE
Stranger: you stole my idea!
You: UNFORTUNATELY IT IS DIFFICULT TO KEEP THE SEMEN HEATED SO THAT IT DOES NOT DIE
You: WITHOUT HEATING IT SO MUCH THAT IT DRIES
Stranger: I thought it could survive 48 hours if it's not dried out
Stranger: if you could get a little vacuum pack thing going
You: THAT DOES NOT RESOLVE THE TEMPERATURE ISSUE
Stranger: it probably needs to survive for an hour or so tops, anyway
You: WE HAVE DONE SOME TRIAL RUNS
You: AND OUTSIDE OF ACCEPTABLE TEMPERATURE RANGES THE SEMEN DIES RATHER QUICKLY
Stranger: well maybe the other partner could just sort of keep it in her mouth, and then sort fo spit into the other end of the dildo at the right time!
You: WITHIN 20 MINUTES WE HAD SEVERAL RUNS WHERE THE SPERM HAD A MORTALITY RATE APPROACHING 85%
Stranger: you need strong sperm\
You: THERE WOULD NOT BE ENOUGH SUCTION TO GET IT THROUGH
Stranger: not weak homo sperm
You: AND BESIDES WHO WOULD WANT TO KEEP SEMEN IN THEIR MOUTH THAT LONG
Stranger: well they can get really desperate for their own babies
You: ONE MOMENT, I AM NOT FEELING SO WELL
Stranger: ask me I know, I have way too many lesbo friends
Stranger: ok, put wifey on
Stranger: Mrs Dildo Dude?
You: UGH
You: MY HEART
You: HELP
Stranger: get your wife to call 119
You: IT HURHJGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGG
You have disconnected.

Update!


We have strong indicators that http://ranatalus.livejournal.com is written by a woman (97%).

http://www.genderanalyzer.com/?url=http%3A%2F%2Franatalus.livejournal.com


<math>if ranatalus = gay then gay = ranatalus</math>


Update!


Rumors are circulating that Ranatalus is married to a woman. This is NOT true, he is still together with porn fingers and plans to move to Paris in the spring.

--872987048729-158306 01:03, 4 January 2009 (CST)